Well I did something that I do believe I've never done before ... bought something because of an infomercial!!  My furry friend sometimes likes to get up and go out in the middle of the night then I am left trying to go back to sleep.  Thus, the TV comes on.  I stumbled upon the P90X  infomercial and there was something about it that totally grabbed my attention.  I think it was the personal trainer Tony Horton.  He wasn't over the top annoying and I liked his concepts.  So the next day I did some research online, no I don't usually impulse buy, and found I should check out his more intro program Power 90.  After doing more googling I came to the conclusion I really have nothing to lose there's a full guarantee of refund up to ninety days.

So on Sunday I started the program, and I have to say I really like it!!  I have a long way to go till I'm ready to go to P90X, but by the same token seeing how he operates it's totally doable.  A lot of the stuff I am familiar with and there are certainly some things I will have to work to be able to do properly but I love the way he mixes up the the routine.  Some yoga, free weights (dumbbells), boxing... it's actually fun.  And it's not so long that it's not manageable.  Lots of stretching and I haven't really been sore much.

This was exactly what I was looking for and so far I look forward to the daily workouts!!  You can find it at www.beachbody.com

The butterfly is beautiful and elusive

Moving with the wind beneath her wings

People like to watch her and love her from afar

Then there are those who think they should capture her and put her on a shelf

She doesn't like being on a shelf, she's meant to fly

This builds distrust

What she wants is someone to fly with her... side by side

Do you every stop feeling the loss of your daddy? I've been in a mellow mood, yes another birthday coming. No, I'm not sad because of the aging thing, that's great! I'm sad because I'm always remnded of what I still long for but can't have. I know at this point in my life I should have gotten use to the loss but honestly I just haven't, I'm really not sure I ever will. Now that I've reconnected with my bio mom I can ask those questions of what were those few months like? Yes, how many months were there really? So it looks like I had my dad for four months before he left for Germany and when he came back he was broken. Yes, broken, it's the best way I think to describe someone who's there but not. So I had my dad in one piece for a few months and I've missed him my whole life. And I can't even remember those few months because I was a new born. Kinda twisted at best.

So I ponder when will the void heal? or will it go to the grave with me? I know it's a small thing to lose when so many people have even less. But it sill hurts after all these years. And I know first hand that no one else can replace your daddy no matter how much you want them to. I'll have another birthday and a good cry, have to own those emotions ya know, and try not to feel this way till the next holiday.

All you men out there with daughters, don't forget you really do matter in their life. It's just a pure and simple fact of life, every daughter needs to be a Daddy's Girl!

So you've been journaling for years now and you have the books accumulated in some corner.... they've served their purpose of dealing with the day to day stress, does that mean they are now trash or a potential novel?  After eight years of journaling I decided to take a trip down memory lane and see if there was anything to be gained from exploring the adventure on a more intimate level.

I must honestly say that I was surprised by what I've found thus far!  I didn't know how far I'd come in my journey.  I tend to push myself and well have been known to be hyper-crtical of my shortcomings, yet I had to give myself a great deal of credit for how far I'd come.  Granted I've only read through two years worth of journals so far but these are some of highlights from my reflection.

Funny when we manifest things they just don't always arrive as we expect!  Or at least that's been my experience of late.  It makes me laugh, that much I can say for sure.  I've gotten a lot of clarity in what/how I'd like my business to grow and with it I've been asking the cosmos for specific types of clients.  And what has come my way has just been a very big surprise.  I'm just going with the flow because really you just never know.

I've found I haven't always seen clearly enough to ask for what I needed.  But I know that I lover the work I do, I get so lost in what I'm doing sometimes that the day just evaporates away.  I love the challenges, the constantly changing technology, new widgets, tools, the community of coders and designers.... It's like this big adventure, some days easier than others but I'm just a total techno geek and love it.  It's always been in my blood.

You have to check out this site and the videos Playing for Change. And follow them on Facebook fan page so you see the latest videos! They just loaded the Keb'Mo' one on facebook and it is as usual when it comes to Keb'Mo' awesome!! I got to meet him last year because he was in town for a concert and he's a vegetarian so I got the pleasure of talking to him at the local veg restaurant. And rambled on about Ayurveda!! But hands down a great guy, very tall!!